


Dog and Butterfly

by NorthwesternInsanity



Category: Catch-22 - Joseph Heller
Genre: Angst, Death In War, Dog and Butterfly (song), Drama, Existential Crisis, F/M, Gen, Heart (band) - Freeform, Loss of Innocence, Nately in an existential crisis, Plane Crash, Poor Piloting, Rescue, Romance, Songfic, chaos as normal, meaning of life and death, whore house
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-11
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-26 10:36:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12057231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NorthwesternInsanity/pseuds/NorthwesternInsanity
Summary: Nately despised that old man and everything he had to say.  But as his life comes to a close and the plane goes down in the water, he realizes that the old man's words may be worth more than he saw them to be. (Songfic.)





	Dog and Butterfly

**Author's Note:**

> Dog and Butterfly (the song) belongs to the band Heart, and the Wilson sisters. I do not own those lyrics.
> 
> A fic I wrote as a gift for my AP Lang teacher a few years back by taking Nately's point of view to analyze this section of the book through a song.

A chaotic crowd of girls continued making the rounds through the house, and Nately continued to search for the one he loved. However, there was one despicable thing in his way.

That old man. That gaunt and dissipated old man with shabby long white hair in that repulsive musty blue armchair -cackling sardonically like some deranged cynic. He was drunk as a skunk -Nately could tell -and poised to make as many disparaging, unpatriotic jokes about America again, just to see Nately upset. Nately could not stand the old man. The old man disgusted him -and somehow despite being almost the polar opposite, he still reminded Nately of his father -something Nately just could not begin to understand.

"America will lose the war. And Italy -will be the one to win it." the old man smugly said in his low, raspy tone. He seemed to smile maliciously as if he just knew how much this one statement could cut into Nately and was enjoying it.

Nately resisted the urge to snap, trying the diplomatic route. "America is the strongest and most prosperous nation on Earth- and her fighting men are second to none. Anything worth living for is worth dying for- and America is worth dying for to save"

The old man smiled with taunting amusement and chuckled. "Right, but also wrong, you foolish child. Italy is one of the least prosperous nations on Earth, and our fighting men are second to all- yet that is why my country does so well in war and yours does so poorly. The Germans may have occupied us and are being driven out, but regardless we are still here. You won't be here much longer but we still will be. We may be weak, but we are strong. While American and German soldiers continue to die trying to occupy countries, Italian soldiers continue to survive. We will continue to exist while the pride of your country destroys you."

Nately was disgusted with the old man as usual, and his last fuse went. This was blasphemy. This old man was a traitor. If Nately were one of the G-men, he'd take great joy in the ability of his position and lock this old man up! "America will never be destroyed!" he roared with enraged, patriotic passion.

"How do you know?" the old man prodded softly. "If Rome, Greece, Persia, Spain, and all the great countries were destroyed -what's to say yours won't be either? How can your country last forever? In twenty five million years the earth inevitably will be destroyed by the sun anyway. Can your country even last five million years? As long as the frog?"

Nately felt fury rage through him, yet he could not seem to come back with a proper response.

_There I was with the old man, stranded again so off I'd ran_  
A young world crashin' around me  
No possibilities of gettin' what I need  
He looked at me and smiled said, "No, no, no, no, no child" 

Nately was at an embarrassing loss for words. Had he tried all night to come up with a response, rather than giving up as he did, he would have been no more successful than a hyper puppy dog in the country fields of America, back home, chasing after leaves blowing in the wind, birds, insects, or the bright, butterflies -that fluttered around tauntingly, slow enough to catch, but just out of reach. Like the puppy, Nately was trying so hard to catch those words he almost always did on other occasions when he had been told off as if he were a child who did not know any better, but he just could not get them to the tip of his tongue this time. They would not, regardless of how hard he tried.

_See the dog and butterfly up in the air he like to fly_  
Dog and butterfly below she had to try  
She roll back down to the warm soft ground laughin'  
She don't know why, she don't know why dog and butterfly 

He could have taken his girl and gone to bed. He could have rescued her from her sullen boredom and misery. He, as well as the girl, could have both then been safe -away from the old man, though nothing could have prevented somebody else from intruding on them later. Desperate in his desire to at least create some comeback, Nately struggled on, much like the weary war-torn city around him -pulling together the words he could come up with, even if they only just restated his earlier argument.

"We may not last forever because the world itself is going to be destroyed some day. But America is going to survive and triumph for a long, long time." he spat indignantly.

"How long? Not even as long as the frog, perhaps?" quipped the old man, grinning in a mocking way, knowing he had just cornered Nately back where he had a few minutes ago.

"Much longer than you or me!" Nately desperately argued, at loss for words again.

"Well, you seem so gullible at my old age, as I am a hundred and seven years old. But, that's not much longer at all -and I see you don't believe my age either." The old man grinned at Nately's look of chagrin.

"I don't believe you, on that or anything else. It doesn't matter. What I do believe is that America will win the war -and that is what matters!" declared Nately.

"Or does it?" asked the old man, a scoffing tone arising in his words. "You put so much stock in winning wars, yet the real trick lies in losing them -knowing which wars can be lost. Italy won the war in Ethiopia -but promptly fell into trouble. Victory created such a sense of grandeur, and we helped start a war we could not have won as a result of swollen pride. The wars Italy has lost -we have come out much better by not succeeding. And while being defeated may have injured Italy's pride, things have taken a turn for better now that we have lost. We let ourselves succeed by being defeated. Sure, your country is on top with all these victories now, but how much longer can it go on? How much longer can you grasp each victory until you must either swallow your pride, or be defeated by victory?"

Nately struggled for words, even deeper into this roundabout, and only able to come up with three. "You're a madman!" He could see where the old man was going and his message, but it just didn't make any sense and he failed to wrap his mind around it. Italy held such a low status compared to any other country involved in world affairs. America had won every major war, and were prospering better than ever -the prospect of victory had brought them back from the Great Depression -the only major threat to prosperity he'd seen. How could victory be bad? How could it be their downfall? "You talk like you're mad!" he repeated, accusingly.

_Well I stumbled upon your secret place_  
Safe in the trees you had tears on your face  
Wrestlin' with your desires, frozen strangers stealin' your fires  
The message hit my mind, only words that I could find 

"You're an opportunistic turncoat!" Nately realized, seeing how the man took advantage of whoever was leading Italy. Now he knew the old man had to be in the wrong. He had no principles, and couldn't have much morality either. 

"It's all perfectly true," began the old man in reply to Nately's confusion. He proceeded to tell of his jubilation when Germany marched in, screaming his lungs out in hails to the Nazi leaders, and his new fascination with the American occupiers, and even worse -hitting Major - de Coverley right in the eye with a red rose!

"You have no principals, and no morality!" Nately was gasping with disbelief and disgust, not sure whether he was nauseated by the man's words, or still struck by disbelief.

"I am a very moral man," the old man retorted. "You may think that because a country is worth living for, it is worth dying for, but a country is simply a piece of land. But what is worth dying for is much more worth living for. You are naive, and swept into the glory of risking one's life for their country while under the control of the gods of war."

Nately sighed, shaking his head in disgust. "And yet, if I did not fight and allowed myself to live without any risk of getting killed while under the control of another country, I would be simply living on my knees, when it would be better to die on my feet."

"I am afraid you have the old saying backwards. It is better to live on one's feet than to die on one's knee. You will understand, some day."

_We see the dog and butterfly up in the air he like to fly_  
Dog and butterfly below she had to try  
She roll back down to the warm soft ground  
Laughin' to the sky, up to the sky dog and butterfly 

He *dreaded* the possibility of running into the old man again his next return to Rome, but instead, what Nately saw was worse. His girl, held captive by the middle age officers, overseen by Aarfy -told to say "Uncle" with the promise of being let go, and then forced to say it again and again. She was exhausted, but they did not care, and instead threatened her. When he arrived, his heart nearly stopped, as she smiled at him for the first time - but he was furious with how she had been treated. How could the world around him be so cold? Why? How could Aarfy just do such a thing and watch? 

He was shocked, but grateful when Yossarian stepped in and threatened the general and the other men to get them to let his girl go, and distract him so that they could get her out. For once, Yossarian was being serious. Nately did think briefly maybe he was just being serious because a woman was involved, but that was the least of his worries -especially when she woke up the next morning, secured by a good night's sleep, and now, clearly in love with him. He internally chuckled at how the general had paled at Dunbar when he threatened to throw him out the window. Maybe that was a cold, cruel thing to do, but the general and the world were already being so cruel, they deserved a taste of their own medicine, for balance.

And for further balance, now all he needed to do was reform his girl so she would get away from that awful old man and stop sleeping with Captain Black.

Maybe, that was a bit too far and knocked things out of balance, because the next thing he knew upon leaving the apartment, a furious Yossarian punched him hard in the nose, breaking it, knocking him in the hospital, and knocking things back into their balance of constant chaos.

_We're gettin' older the world's gettin' colder_  
For the life of me I don't know the reason why  
Maybe it's livin' makin' us give in, hearts rollin' in taken back on the tide  
We're balanced together ocean upon the sky 

Nately was now bound and determined to volunteer for and fly as many missions as he needed -even if he somehow managed to pass what Colonel Cathcart wanted -to stay in Italy, for if he was sent home, he would have no easy way of getting to see his girl in Rome. While he still did not like his time in Pianosa, that crazy, AirForce base island town, it was worth it. 

He could not figure out why Yossarian kept telling him not to fly more missions. His reasoning was that he was being a devious rebel, and trying to get others to rebel from Colonel Cathcart without blatantly planning it. Any other reason would just likely chalk up to him being plain crazy, which seemed more the case -especially when he thought for a slight second as Yossarian was begging him to not go on the mission that he just might cry, and saw him run off to pray -when Yossarian was not the praying type. Either way, Nately wasn't going for whatever the crazy Captain had cooked up in his mind.

He climbed up into the bomber that was ready to go on its mission, knowing he was securing his stay in Pianosa so he could get to Rome -where he would be free with his girl for the time he had after his missions. They were doing an attack on a dry dock in La Spezia, some odd port town that housed a lot of deep water vessels. The strike, no doubt, would be a major wound to the Nazis.

But, to everyone's surprise in that bomber, somehow, the townspeople knew. Flak flew up from the mountains below in every direction, aimed right at them. There was no escape.

Havermeyer screamed orders, maneuvers that would would take sheer luck and a miracle for the B-25 to make. 

"ROLL PORT- WHO THE *HELL* PUT DOBBS ON PILOT?!" he demanded.

Nately gasped. Indeed, it was Dobbs flying the plane now -there was no possible way they'd make it out with him in control, as he could not fly for anything.

It came into his mind, what would happen if he died in this crash. His girl, all alone, heartbroken. With no doubt, Yossarian would be the one to take it upon himself to tell her. Would she stay faithful after he was gone? Or would she somehow get snatched up by Yossarian.

"Oh, God, Dobbs, let somebody else have the controls -if you don't, there's no way we're not going to die. I can't die-!"

_But didn't I originally say anything worth living for was worth dying for?_

Nately's mind flashed back to that conversation with the old man. Yet now, how could he die when he would be leaving his girl behind, with the risk she might once again be tortured by those officers and fall back into her hard life of prostitution?

Now he knew it. He hated it, but it now dawned on him. The truth of the old man's words rang clear with the flak flying up around the plane.

_Another night in this strange town, moonlight holdin' me light as down_  
Voice of confusion inside of me  
Just beggin' to go back where I'm free  
Feels like I'm through, then the old man's words are true 

Havermeyer was still yelling at Dobbs, who still had the controls. For a few seconds, it had seemed possible to escape, but then, when Havermeyer shouted to roll to starboard, Dobbs pulled to port. The whole plane rattled with immense force as the plane sideswiped another, ripping the tail off. 

Nately was tossed to the side as the plane lurched, then swung the other direction as the wing broke off, throwing away all sense of the plane's balance, and all hope of a safe emergency landing or miracle of getting away. Dobbs was still slamming on the controls that Havermeyer had ceased to yell for, trying desperately as if there was some hope, as he had to try. Nately dug in the empty compartment, knowing full well what Milo had done with the parachutes. He had to try. Even if there was no chance, he had to, for his country, but more importantly now, for his girl.

 

_We see the dog and butterfly up in the air he like to fly_  
Dog and butterfly, below she had to try  
She roll back down to the warm soft ground  
With a little tear in her eye she had to try, she had to try... 

The plane was rolling down, falling in awkward flips like the dog that jumped up at an awkward angle to catch the errant butterfly. Havermeyer was huddled on the ground, bracing himself for impact, the last thing he would feel, whispering soft words to himself. Nately did not know whether it was prayer, inane words of comfort to himself, or goodbyes to whatever family and friends he had far from here.

She would not here it, but Nately had to try. In the last five seconds, he also huddled down, whispering his last words, vision becoming blurred over.

"I had to try, for you."

Dobbs let go of the controls, giving something a cross between a laugh and a sob, hysterical with panic, knowing there was no chances left. The plane made a final roll, swinging with the weight of its one remaining wing, striking the surface with the wing that plunged into the water, and softly rocking over to plunge down with a spray of sea foam. The plane filled with water. Like the dog, Nately flailed, trying to get to the top of the plane to somehow escape into the water. But, exhaustion overtook him, and he sank down softly to the bottom of the plane, and his girl, his butterfly, was now far away and out of reach.

_Dog and butterfly, yeah, up in the air, he liked to fly_  
The dog and butterfly, below she had to try  
She rolled back down to the warm soft ground  
Laughin' she don't know why but she had to try, she had to try  
Dog and butterfly 


End file.
